Night Gallery – The Cemetery (S1P1)

nightgallery01Five years after The Twilight Zone went off the air, Rod Serling returned with another genre anthology show.  There were many similarities, not the least being Serling hosting, and also writing many of the episodes.

The quality did not match that of The Twilight Zone, and it lasted only 3 years.  Its first airing was in the form of a 2-hour movie with three distinct stories, all written by Serling.  This first installment was The Cemetery.

Although only 5 years removed from TZ, the change in production values is huge, and evidenced from the very first shot.  Not only is the series shot in color, it opens with a sweeping shot of a decaying mansion, panning over to the titular cemetery, all the while leaves are blowing wildly through the frame.  TZ frequently did amazing things with its limited budget and technology of the day, but it seems that Night Gallery benefited from advances in both areas.

nightgallery03Ossie Davis is caretaker to Mr. Hendricks, an elderly artist who has had a stroke and is in a wheelchair, mostly mute.  70’s go-to Brit Roddy McDowall is the ne’er-do-well nephew who discovered that he was next in the old man’s will after his mother died.

Roddy parks his uncle in front of an open window against doctor’s orders.  There is a nice single-shot pull back from a close-up of the old man shivering in the window, ending in the cemetery.  That night, he falls into a coma and passes away.  McDowall doesn’t even pretend to be upset, only inquiring about the money.

He is, however, disturbed by one of his uncles paintings which seems to change each time he looks at it, accusing him like The Tell-Tale Art.  First it just shows a cemetery, then an open grave, then a coffin appears.

McDowall burns the painting, but it stubbornly reappears on the wall.  This time with the coffin open, showing his uncle, causing him to scream in terror.  That night McDowall hears noises and gets up to investigate.  The painting now shows his uncle walking out of the cemetery gates.

nightgallery11McDowall calls the police.  As he hangs up, there is a knocking at the front door, and the painting now shows his uncle at the door.  McDowall goes mad, falling down the stairs and breaking his neck.

The door opens, but the person is shown only from the knees down.  The identity is pretty well telegraphed as there is no creepy music to indicate the dead uncle, there is no uniform to indicate the police, and — oh yeah — the person reaching down to check on McDowall has black hands.  Surprise, it is Ossie Davis!

All is explained, and that could have been the end of the story.  However, there is an epilogue that throws another twist into the story.  This is more like a Tales from the Crypt story than one of the old Twilight Zones.  It does, however, do a great job of setting the tone for the series which will be more horror than sci-fi.

The disc itself is not Blu-Ray but is a very sharp transfer despite the occasional artifacts.

Post-Post:

  • Just as with Tales from the Crypt, kudos to the marketing department for selling the “Complete First Season” and not mentioning on the package that it was only 6 episodes long.
  • For some bizarre reason, the 8th episode of season 2 is also included in the 1st season collection.  Maybe marketers felt guilty.
  • It was a little disturbing in the beginning as I thought McDowall was calling Davis porter-boy rather than his name Portifoy.
  • Director Boris Sagal was the father of Peg Bundy.  He died after walking into the rotor blade of a helicopter.  What is it with TZ and helicopters?

Tales from the Crypt – The Switch (S2E2)

Holy crap, I remember seeing this one 23 years ago.

Sadly, the first shot is of the grating William “fingernails-on-a-blackboard” Hickey who made his Outer Limits episode just about unwatchable.  He tells his butler, Mr. Pitt from Seinfeld, that he is hopelessly in love with a young woman.  Demonstrating that he has learned nothing about women in his 114 years on earth, he has kept his wealth a secret from her just to be sure she really loves him.

tftcswitch03

Mrs. John Travolta. Maybe I should reconsider this Scientology thing.

He proposes, but the woman, Kelly Preston, tells him she can’t because he is old enough to be her grandfather — and she is being charitable at that.  He vows to change for her, and goes to a plastic surgeon.  The doctor refers him to a mad scientist who can actually do a face transplant with a handsome young man.

Hickey has to fork over $1M for the surgery, having gone out-of-network.  $100k is for the surgery, and $900k is for the donor.  Sporting his new mug, he goes to see Kelly again.  His new face is a little strange.  It appears that they just made Hickey up to look younger.  His face is fuller, over-sized in a paper mache sort of way, like a Mardi Gras float.  Also, in this procedure, “face” apparently includes the hair.  But that same biting-on-tin-foil voice is there.

She says the face is weirdly OK, but that his old decrepit body is a turn-off.  Back to the mad scientist for a torso transplant at a mere $2 million.  Hickey checks himself out post-op and is amazed by his physique.  He still has the sliding-down-a-razorblade-bannister voice, though.

tftcswitch05Kelly is impressed by stud-boy.  At the beach, however, she gets a gander at his scrawny legs.  So back to the mad scientist.  $3 million will finish the job at $1 million per appendage.  Sadly, he can no longer afford Mr. Pitt, so let’s him go.

Fully transformed, he rushes to see Kelly.  She has married the donor who has been transformed into an old man — now portrayed by Hickey.  The difference is, he is now rich from the surgeries, which is what she always wanted.  And Mr. Pitt works for them.

Great episode.  Even the repellent William Hickey could not ruin it.  Season 2 is on a streak.

Post-Post:

  • Writer Richard Tuggle wrote Tightrope and Escape from Alcatraz for Clint Eastwood.  Then nothing.  Absolutely noting.  IMDb has no date of death.  Very mysterious.
  • One of Ahnold Schwarzenegger’s 2 directing credits.
  • Rick Rossovich as the donor was best known to me from the excellent film Roxanne.
  • Hickey, playing Carlton Webster here, played Carlton Blanchard on a few episodes of Wings.  If there is a reason for this coincidence, I am not interested enough to find it.
  • The mad scientist is the guy who played Data in Stratagema on Star Trek TNG.  For some reason, I always thought that was Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley.

Outer Limits – Living Hell (S1E8)

So blah is this episode that there is not one interesting visual to include.

Ben Kohler is the most happy-go-lucky guitar-toting unemployed construction worker in America. After getting turned away from a job-site, his lucky streak continues when he is shot in the head.

He is taken to the hospital.  When they begin cutting on his skull, another man collapses in his kitchen.  Turns out Dr. Jennifer Martinez has taken this opportunity to place an experimental cerebral chip in Kohler’s head.  What is strange is that the other guy is zapped even before the chip is put in Kohler’s brain.  What triggered it?  Just being taken out of the file cabinet?

Turns out this other man, Wayne Haas,  has an earlier version of the chip in his noggin.  Oh, and Haas, is a serial killer — just as in a dozen other shows and movies.  But the twist here is that Kohler sees through Haas’s eyes as he . . . . no, wait that’s also just like all the other stories.

Dr. Martinez takes Kohler home with her and . . . and . . .

I just can’t work up enough interest to continue.  Yada yada, Kohler shorts out both chips, sacrificing himself to save Dr. Martinez.  The end.

Post-Post:

  • Maybe Elizabeth Pena is a great actress, but she is terrible here.
  • Living hell indeed.

 

Ray Bradbury Theater – On the Orient, North (S2E8)

Again with the European cast.  This is turning into Masterpiece Theater.  Except for the Masterpiece part.

Minerva Halliday is on the Orient Express heading north.  She spots a sickly man and graciously dubs him The Ghastly Passenger.

As she leaves the dining car, she puts a hand on his shoulder and says, “I believe.”  Later that night, a conductor is looking for a doctor for TGP, and Minerva volunteers her services as a nurse.  She diagnoses him as being dead.  But only mostly dead, so she begins speaking to him.

She met someone like TGP when she was 6 years old in Ireland and understands that he is a ghost.  Relieved that someone finally recognizes his plight, he laughs and gains strength from her belief.

rbtorient02She offers to escort him to London.   During a layover in Paris, she takes him to Père Lachaise Cemetary.   Sadly, they do not stop by the ol’ Jim Morrison place.  They do stop at Frédéric Chopin’s grave where he is surprisingly listed as Fred.

Back on the train, Minerva gives TGP several books featuring ghostly characters.  Being pre-Kindle, just lugging them around will probably kill him.

In Calais, a group of children gather around the couple.  Being believers in ghosts (i.e. young and stupid), they strengthen TGP.  Feeling particularly chirpy, he levitates as he tells them his ghost story.

In Dover, TGP is looking full of life.   But, darn the luck, Minerva drops dead on the dock.  Now they can go off and find a nice castle to haunt together.

rbtorient01The episode is very faithful to the story, even reusing much of the dialog, although the print version is largely levitation-free.  The story really works better in print, however, in no small part because it does not have the dreadful electronic score behind it.  TGP wears his ashen make-up well, although he does seem miscast.  Minerva brings a nice European MILFy vibe to her role as caretaker.

Can’t recommend, but it did have a certain charm to it, especially on the printed back-lit Kindle screen.

Post-Post:

  • In Roman mythology, Minerva is the Goddess of Wisdom, but has minors in medicine and magic.
  • TGP is corporeal, others acknowledge his presence, he can’t move through walls, he rattles no chains; in what sense is he a ghost?  In their new home, they will not be haunting, but more like squatting.

 

Alfred Hitchcock Presents – Momentum (S1E39)

ahmomentum01Richard Hertz, er I mean Paine begins the episode with a semi-voiceover. That is, he is narrating, but appears as a translucent ghost over scenes of the big city rat-race that he is bemoaning.

Having just been passed over for yet another sales job, he goes home to wife Beth.  She insists that he go to see his former boss who owes him $450 in back-wages.  He decides a better course of action is to hit a bartender up for a loan.  Sadly, this rock-solid source of capital lost it on the ponies.  So he goes to see his ex-boss.

When he gets there, he sees that Mr. Burroughs has company and doesn’t wish to embarrass him by asking for his wages.  He’s not above peeking in his window, however, where he sees Burroughs pull out a wad of cash and hand it to his unseen guest.

ahmomentum02After the guest leaves, and the lights are turned out, Paine lifts up a window and crawls inside to get his $450.  As he is counting out the exact amount, because he has told us he will only take that amount, Burroughs enters with a gun.  There is a struggle as Burroughs is calling the police and he is shot.

Paine heads back to Beth.  Because this couple has the communication skills of Oceanic 815 passengers, there is more death. As always in AHP-world, justice is eventually served.

This was the final episode of season one and it is suitably nasty as far as the censors would allow at the time.  Justice is served, but after 2 even more senseless than usual deaths. Good stuff.

Post-Post:

  • AHP Deathwatch:  We’ve got a couple of live ones!  Skip Homeier and Joanne Woodward are still with us.  Possibly a couple of others, or their obscurity just means their deaths were overlooked by IMDb.
  • AHP Proximity Alert: Harry Taylor was in 6 episodes this season, including one just 2 weeks earlier.  Give somebody else a chance!
  • The apartment hunter was just in Decoy 2 weeks ago.
  • Joanne Woodward = Mrs. Paul Newman for 50 years.
  • Skip Homeier is famous for 2 iconic roles – both of them in Star Trek:  Melakon the Nazi and Dr. Sevrin the space hippie with the designer ears.