Dr. Mark Crest is working on a teleportation device.  Bets are being taken on the outcome of today’s test using animals.  I appreciate that the betting pools on the board are:

• Super-Intelligent Dog (3:2)
• Animal Soup (7:1)
• The Fly (20:1)
• Total Success (100:1)

We also learn that Mark was a naughty boy sexing it up in the cloak room at Lt. Glade’s party last night.  Even more so after Julie joined him.

That has gotten him in trouble with Dr. Cleo Lazar. With a minimum of additional melodrama, they begin the countdown.  The test is to transport a dog and a raccoon “a few miles”.  Wait, how could that result in a “super-intelligent dog”?  Doesn’t that imply the raccoon is super-dooper intelligent?  And what happens to the cute tail and bandit eyes?  Frankly, the smart money is on “Animal Soup”.  A wormhole is created and the animals disappear.  Glade gets excited, but I feel like that is the easy part.  Unfortunately, the animals do not reappear in the lab.  The field keeps expanding, so Mark heroically runs across the lab and unplugs the transformer in an explosive shower of light and sparks.^[1]

He finds himself back in time, 18 hours before the test.  And wearing the same shirt, BTW.  Cleo is in a different outfit, so what gives? ^[2]  He chalks it up to deja vu.  Julie flirts with him, but Cleo interrupts them.  She is already steamed that Mark hijacked her idea for disposing of toxic nuclear waste and corrupted it into a transporter.  Here’s an idea: transport it!

That night, they are at the aforementioned party (and Mark has still not bothered to put on a fresh shirt).  Julie purposely spills champagne on his shirt, so he goes to the aforementioned cloak room rather than, say, a laundry room or kitchen with running water.  Wait, this is replaying the previous night, so he also did not change his shirt after champagne being spilled on it and before work the next day?  Anyhoo, Julie follows him into the cloakroom and begins seducing him.  After some smooching, they come out, to the distress of Cleo.

At work the next day, in the same shirt — having been worn now for at least 36 hours and having endured 2 champagne spills — the deja vu really kicks in when he sees the odds board again.  Everything occurs as before.  The field expands, he runs across the lab, he pulls the plug.  And once again time travels to 18 hours before the test.

Deleted Scene: Cleo goes to the salon and asks for the Ayn Rand.

Since Cleo doesn’t hate him yet, he tries to convince her that they have created a time loop.  He fills a board with equations and tells her he has seen the detonation twice, but she doesn’t believe him.  He tells Glade the same story, and is removed from the project.  Julie finds him, though, and brings him to the test site.  He tries to stop the test, and Glade tries to abort it.  But the device goes off again and Mark goes back 18 hours again.

There are more iterations and reveals, including multiple saboteurs.  It is also pointed out that the time loop is getting smaller each time (i.e. Mark goes slightly less far back in time on each iteration).  This point alone feels very original.  This episode is OK, but the ever-tightening time loop is an idea that could be made into an excellent nail-biter.

Other Stuff:

• [1] Kevin Nealon does a surprisingly credible job as Dr. Crest, despite his main experience being only from SNL, and comedy movies or Adam Sandler movies.  That said, his scream at that moment is pretty bad; like he was back on SNL reacting in a Halloween sketch or to a dropped cue card.
• [2] You are thinking that maybe Dr. Crest is like Einstein or Brundlefly, and has a closet full of the same shirt.  But no, he says his girlfriend gave it to him.
• Teri Hawkes (Dr. Lazar) played Jellico in Cube Zero.  Ronny Cox (Lt. Glade) played Jellico on Star Trek TNG.  Crazy, man.

I remember this one from the original 1999 airing, so it must be good.  But I also remember seeing Bicentennial Man in 1999, so . . .

The titular Haven is one of the new high rise condos that promise the residents “the utmost in privacy and security”.  Aside from an occasional awkward encounter in the elevator, the occupants are virtually guaranteed to never see or hear their neighbors.  If unauthorized persons appear on their floor, say selling overpriced, loosely packed cookies, hovering drones will zap them.  There is never any noise, and eye contact is discouraged.  Wait, are you sure this place isn’t called The Heaven?

Caleb is not happy to have to share his elevator with another resident.  No, wait, two residents — what is this, f***ing Woodstock?  George, the holographic concierge, explains that it would be cost-prohibitive for every resident to have a private elevator.

As Caleb walks through his unit the next morning, everything seems to be Alexa’d.  He asks for the blinds to open and they do, he asks for the refrigerator door to open and it does.  He similarly bosses around the cabinets, TV, laptop, and orders muffins.  Suddenly, everything starts glitching.  His appliances turn off, and he is trapped in his condo.  We see from the identical holographic Georges on every floor responding to complaints that the failure is building-wide, not just because Caleb was mean to his toaster, and forget what he told his toilet to do.

After a pretty short time of experiencing the isolation that he pays such high HOA Fees for and still just gets basic cable, Caleb gets cabin fever.  He bundles up some knives and begins hacking away at the wall — literal, not figurative — between him and his neighbor.  Really, what is that going to do?  Isn’t that unit in the same condition as his?  Wouldn’t he have been better off trying to reach the hallway?  How about tossing a paperweight or a sofa out the window with a note attached?  This seems like the worst possible plan — oh wait, his neighbor is a hot chick.  Well-played then.

She also happens to be an electronics whiz.  In no time, she shorts out her door so it swings open.  Alyssa and Caleb go into the hallway which is dim with emergency lighting.  George is back online and actually visible in the dark because, in a masterful bit planning, they used an albino as the model for holographic George.

The rest of the episode is them trying to reach the ground floor while George puts obstacles in their way, sometimes fatally.  It’s not exactly Die Hard in a . . . uh, highrise . . . er, OK just like Die Hard.  So it’s a little like Die Hard, just without the machine guns, homicidal ballet dancer, Huey Lewis look-alike, coke-snorting yuppie, Urkel’s neighbor, Clarence Beeks, and George is no Hans Gruber.  Still, they are trapped in a building, you feel the claustrophobia, and they are constantly in danger and on the move.

Their constant motion gives the episode an inertia the Outer Limits sometimes lacks.  They even have an interesting message at the end.  I’m not sure if it is a great episode, but it is one of my favorites.

Other Stuff:

• Caleb was fine, but I find the actor kind of annoying.  Maybe it’s jealousy because he dated Lorelei on The Gilmore Girls.  Her daughter Rory was hot too.  I could have gone either way in that family, being right in the middle of the two of them.  Two years younger than Lorelei, and 13 years older than her daughter.  Yep, right in the middle.  Too close to call, really. ^[1]
• [1] Based on the reboot ages; I’m not an monster.

Wait a minute, the guys from Motley Crüe went on a camping trip?  Oh, wait, I guess these are cavemen.  The goofy clothing and hair threw me off, although I suspect the smell would not have cleared things up.  One of the guyz gets the hots for a girl at the boar-roast and beats her mate to death in a sneak attack.  Even back then, the cute ones went for Neanderthals.  He screams triumphantly and grabs the girl.

Arthur in the lab.

This is just a daydream by meek anthropologist Arthur Zeller as he stares at an exhibit on prehistoric man.  He is jolted back to reality as James and Laura, who he has a crush on, leave for the night.  Arthur returns to his lab and injects a serum marked DOMINANCE into a mouse which was meek as, well, a mouse.  The mouse becomes more aggressive and Arthur sees this as a way for mankind to reacquire some lost virtues.  He presents his findings to the funding committee.

This must be the toughest Anthropology Department in America.  Arthur’s colleagues are all alpha-males who continually play pranks on him and emasculate him in front of Laura.  Chairman Stansfield tells Arthur later that he is not funding his project because he thinks he does not have the guts to fight the challenges to his work.  The proposal seems worthy though as 3 days later, the test rat has crushed his enemies and heard the lamentations of their lady-rats.  Like every scientist ever on Outer Limits, he decides to use the drug on himself.

Arthur doing an experiment.

The next day at work, he is more assertive.  He suggests a hardball plan to deal with rival researchers.  He tells the Chairman that he is afraid to do what is necessary to keep this department on top.  And he says he doesn’t care what they think, he is going to keep eating at Chic-Fil-A!  When James teases him about his new attitude, Arthur tells him, “F*** off.”

Hey, Hollywood, take a lesson from Canada.  This was an effective jolt because we get maybe one F-bomb per season from this series.  Hollywood version:

James:  What the fuck, Arthur?  You’re acting like a fucking maniac!  Are you fucking high?

Arthur:  Fuck off for fuck’s sake.  Boy, I hate that fucking Chic-Fil-A!

As Arthur continues taking the DOMINANCE drug, he becomes more aggressive.  He shouts down the homeless guy who always hassles him.  At work, staring at the caveman exhibit, he begins to channel the caveman.  We get caveman-POV shots of the man’s dog as the man follows him through the jungle on a hunt.  Then I guess we get a dog’s-ass-POV because we see the caveman running toward the camera.  Laura’s scream awakens him as he has just hurled a spear that nearly pierced both her ears; the hard way.

Arthur testing his flint spear theory.

He explains that he has been researching the penetrating power of flint spears.  He apologizes and says he would “never want to skewer you . . . not with a spear anyway.”  Heyyyoooo!  My man!  Oh, wait, she doesn’t appreciate that.  She stomps away outraged at that kind of lewd talk from a guy who doesn’t look like George Clooney.  With his new-found confidence and aggression, he gives the Chairman a beat-down that night.

Well, it goes on mostly where you would expect since we have seen this story a hundred times.  Leland Orser did excellent work here as the meek Arthur all the way through to the uninhibited caveman.  That is really the best reason to sit through this episode.  Jenny Copper was also good as Laura.  The others were mostly so loathsome that it is hard to be objective.

Arthur discussing his research.

The ending was unexpected.  I guess after going all Altered States, Arthur didn’t have Blair Brown’s awesomeness to ground him back to his human form.

Other Stuff:

• Title Analysis:  Yeah, I get it, but what a waste of a title.  Look at the movie The Descent — that’s what I want from a descent!

Ministry of Defense Envoy Katherine Woods is sending a message from space to her young son.  She knows the war is scary, but she tells him, “It’s our job to talk with the Dregs and try to stop the bad feelings between us.”  Well, maybe not calling them the Dregs would be a start.  She is confident, having previously negotiated treaties with the Scumbags and the Poopyheads.

The Dregs are late to the titular summit.  Colonel Thurman takes this as a sign that 1) they are not coming, 2) this might be a set-up for a terrorist strike, and 3) he really over-ordered on the shrimp.  They finally see a Dreg ship approaching.  It soon goes out of control and the Dregs immediately suspect sabotage by the humans.  They arm their weapons, so we blow them out of the sky (Team Humans!  F*** yeah!).  Sadly, they were apparently right over top of the base at the time so the debris rains down on the base killing our Ambassador.  Earth and Dreg Central both launch their fleets.  In 3 hours, there will be a war.

Thurman takes charge, but Woods reminds him that she is in charge until there is a declaration of war.  He says she is in over her head and “the only order she has ever given is for desert at a diplomatic function.”

Somehow Dregosian Ambassador Prosser and his sidekick survived the crash of their ship and force their way into the facility.  The frightening Prosser has yellow-green snake-like eyes set in hellish red sockets.  But mostly he is terrifying because he is played by Michael Ironside.  He tells Woods that after 5 generations of oppression, the Dregs are fighting back.  Engineered by humans to serve their needs, they work under a sun so bright that they need yellow eyes to reflect its rays, and a third lung to tolerate the thin atmosphere.  Prosser says they are through working in the mines!  Wait, then why is the bright sun a problem if they work in mines?

The actors — especially Michael Ironside and John Spencer — do a great job, although the casting did most of the work.  There is nothing particularly wrong with the episode.  It just feels like a missed opportunity.  The first act reminded me of the classic Trial by Fire — an untested leader suddenly thrust into a global conflict.  It never achieved that level, though.  The fourth act should have been awesome.  The stakes are so high, and the sacrifices made are so final that it could have been a series highlight.  Sadly, the direction is unimaginative and the score is utterly lacking in support for the drama on screen.

Still, the performances and script make a decent episode.

I think I’ll pass on this one.

It begins in a German Concentration Camp.  The excellent production values immediately pull you in.  The camp, the crowds, the costumes, the casting . . . all show that they took extra care with this episode.  It is so effective and so evocative of The Holocaust that I’m not interested in fooling around with it.  I doubt you’ll see Cinema Sins doing Everything Wrong with Schindler’s List.

A few random comments:  Saul Rubinek is less annoying than usual; certainly more tolerable than in Gotcha!  Lindsay Crouse is always welcome.

This is the first time I recall an Outer Limits episode title being shown in anything other than the standard OL font.  TRIBUNAL is shown in a classic German font (like Wolfenstein).  This is strange because the titular tribunal is not in Nazi Germany.  Their representative is not even German. ^[1]  I don’t see the point.

Outer Limits is usually pretty tame on the language and graphic violence.  This one did contain one of their most graphic, or at least brutal, kills.

There is a dedication at the end by the writer.  It is a tragic real-world cap to the episode.  It just seemed disrespectful to include it here.

It doesn’t feel right to say this was one of Outer Limits’ best episodes.  Even though the story has strong sci-fi elements, the real-world connection puts it in its own class.  It is excellent, though.

Footnotes:

• [1] I don’t know Alex Diakun’s ethnicity, but he did play Indian Joe on Huckleberry Finn and his Friends.  Wait, Indian Joe?  I guess it makes sense to sanitize the nickname for a kid’s show.  Otherwise Huck’s friend Jim wouldn’t be in it at all.