Category Archives: Short Story

When Super Apes Plot – Anthony Wilder

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pulpfiction01We open in a seaplane that has set down in a lake in Borneo.  Similar to Servant of the Beast, there is an elderly professor, his hot niece, and a black guide, Batu.  In this story, the 4th wheel is the girl’s husband — so I’m confident there will be no love triangle, this being 1919.

They have brought presents to pacify the Bamangani natives which should “keep them jabbering with delight for years.”  Er, at this point, it seems that the titular Ape-Men are the natives.  Awkward.

Dr. Dumont has come to Borneo to study the natives — he wants to see if any of them have . . . uh, tails.  He does at least concede that they “used to be” headhunters and cannibals — so that’s progress.  The young couple, Tom & Irene, are given no motivation other than “Borneo brought back memories of the days when they first met.”

After breakfast, Tom & Batu arm up and take a boat to the shore.  As they explore the jungle, Batu spots the footprints of many feet and determines that they are moving toward the plane.  They hear two shots ring out — the universal distress call of hot babes being attacked by natives.  Although two shots in the noggins of their attackers might have been more effective.  Making their way back to the plane, they see Dumont and Irene being perp-walked through the jungle.

Tom & Batu confront the group.  Batu, speaking their language demands that his friends be released.   The natives are taking them back for trial in the death of a man shot while boarding the plane.  Surely this would be a kangaroo court — literally — so Tom & Batu let their “talking-sticks” speak for them and the four explorers make their escape.

After Dumont is hit by a spear, they hole up in a cave for a while.  Under cover of darkness, they make their way back to the plane.  Having learned nothing, Mike & Batu swim out to the plane, leaving Irene and her injured uncle behind.  Naturally, they are again abducted.  Tom dives into the water and storms the beach but is taken down by 10 of the tribe.

The three of them are taken to a hut near the volcano which has been rumbling.  So I’m thinking sacrifice.

Fortunately, Batu saves the day.

Meh, pretty standard stuff.

Post-Post:

  • First published in Top-Notch Magazine, December 1919.
  • Also that month:  Not much of interest . . . dullest month ever.
  • WTH?  This story features the Bamangani; Tarzan fought the fictional Bolmangani, also a race of “gorilla men.”.

The Dead Book – Howard Hersey

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pulpdeadbook01The good news is, it is short — only 134 of whatever arcane units the Kindle uses.

A group of men are stationed in Mindanao in the Philippines.  It is said that if you are stationed there, you should “forget that women ever lived, leave drink alone, and never worry.”

When one of the men, Carson,  commits suicide, Kennedy opines that “a white man was never intended for such a beastly life.”

Carson had become interested in a monastery on the island.  He learned that there was an old hand-painted bible there which had been brought over by Magellan.  The bible was kept behind a closed door, and chained to a desk.  It was said that anyone who spent a night studying it, would never come out alive.

Carson would be the first person to 50 years to examine the book.   When he entered with one of the monks, the monk fell, pulling a table a table over on top of him and crushing his skull.  This sent Carson screaming down the hall.  Carson is nursed back to health from what seems to be no more than a case of the willies.

This is where it gets confusing.  Carson believed a tarantula was behind the deaths.  In his quarters, he believed he saw the tarantula and shot himself.  Let’s examine that.

Kennedy’s theory is that Carson saw a red tie in the mirror and believed it to be the tarantula.  Ted Kennedy’s theory on Chappaquiddick is more believable.  Kennedy refers to “a string” in the book which I am interpreting as one of those ribbons that were used in bibles as a book mark.  That doesn’t look much like a tarantula to me.

Then he believes that Carson pulled out his pistol and pointed it over his shoulder to kill the tarantula, and accidentally shot himself.  Wouldn’t a shoe or the Sunday New York Times have been a more effective weapon (and equally reliable as a source of news)?

This could have been a good story in the vein of The Adventure of the Speckled Band or The Problem of Cell 13.  Instead, it is just a waste of time.

Post-Post:

  • First published in The Thrill Book, July 1919.
  • Also that year:  1st Class Postage drops from 3 cents to 2 cents.  Wait, what?

Night Gallery – Pickman’s Model (S2E11)

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ngpickmansmodel12The episode is framed by scenes with art connoisseurs Larry Rand and Eliot Blackman.  Based on their performances and the superfluousness of their parts, It is reasonable to suspect the producer of casting his relatives once again — they do have other credits, however.

In the opening scene, they are arguing over the authenticity of a Pickman painting.  All but 4 of Pickman’s oil slicks mysteriously disappeared along with the artist 75 years ago.  Rand observes that the signature “looks real enough.”  This analysis doesn’t even rise to the level of tire-kicking when buying a used car.

Because he discovered the painting hidden in his current studio, Blackman believes the studio must have once belonged to Pickman.  Fortunately, rather than filming a title search, the story quickly flashes back to Pickman picking up a few bucks by teaching a drawing class to a group of “young ladies of good families.”

ngpickmansmodel17

A little over the top, but appreciated.

He is showing the same painting — Ghoul Preparing to Die — to his class, telling them that it was the result of “drawing what he sees” and that it caused his expulsion from the Boston Art Institute, removal of two of his canvasses from the Cabot Museum, and a punch in the nose.

One of the ladies — Mavis Goldsmith — seems to have a similarly morbid style, seeing a vase of flowers and drawing them as dead and wilted.  Pickman is intrigued by her drawing, but can’t resist drawing the beast’s face in the corner like a Mephistophelean Kilroy.

Mavis tracks Pickman down in a pub.  She asks to go to his studio, but he refuses; no one even knows where it is.  Fortuitously, the location is given away in a Pickman painting that she recently purchased.  Both Pickman and Mavis’ uncle tell her of inhuman tunneling beasts that practice unspeakable acts in the area of his studio.

ngpickmansmodel33Mavis goes to Pickman’s studio against his wishes, and lets herself in.  She wanders into his studio where she sees several paintings all depicting grotesque scenes, many with the same beast.  Pickman discovers her and is in the process of throwing her out when there are noises heard in the hallway.

Pickman grabs a fireplace poker and runs out.  The beast enters and begins carrying Mavis out, when Pickman attacks.  There is a clue as to why Pickman always wears gloves as we glimpse that his bare hand is partially covered with scales — a product of the beast “pro-creating” with his mother.  It is a very quick shot, and I suspect they realized this, so inserted the exact same piece of film a few seconds later so we get a second look.

The beast prevails and carries Pickman’s body down to the tunnels.  Mavis calls her uncle to come loot the gallery.  Her uncle says he must have been insane.  Mavis says, “No, he just painted what he saw . . . and was.”

ngpickmansmodel44We return to the present day. Searching for additional paintings, the two men find a mysterious brick enclosure in the cellar. They start pounding away at it, hoping to strike it rich.  The paintings are not entombed there, but something is.

The episode is so fleshed out that only the bare essentials of Lovecraft’s story remain; and one critical point is abandoned completely.

There is no Mavis in the story — her addition was necessary and welcome.  In the story, the entire narrative is told by one of the dealers in the opening scene — that would have been deadly, especially with these particular actors.  The two men are named Thurber and Eliot in the story (presumably after the writers) — Thurber’s name is changed for the episode.  In the story, the main painting is called Ghoul Feeding, which is much more menacing than the episode’s defeatist title, Ghoul Preparing to Die.

The “Soylent Green is people” moment from the story involved Pickman taking photos and painting his backgrounds from them rather than painting them “live.”  The final revelation that the beast was the subject of one photograph could have worked on TV, but I didn’t miss it.

Overall, great production and great performances from Bradford Dillman (Pickman) and Louise Sorel (Mavis).  Good job on the adaptation, also.

Post-Post:

  • Twilight Zone Legacy:  None.
  • Lovecraft’s story was first published in Weird Tales, October 1927.
  • Despite not being anything extraordinary, the Lovecraft story seems to be a favorite of many people.  There have also been a number of productions of it, some switching the genders of the lead characters.  And one CGI version that is like The Sims: Lovecraft.
  • The only Cabot Museum in Boston is a fictitious one used by Lovecraft in other stories.  Just a little harmless fan-service, I guess.

Outer Limits – First Anniversary (S2E7)

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olfirstanniversary01aI was not looking forward to watching this one.  The short story was only 7 pages and kind of a one-joke piece.  Bulking it up to fill a one hour slot seemed a little 4th-Season Twilight Zoney to me.

Luckily, it was fleshed out with additional characters and featured some interesting performers.  I’m sure a lot of care was taken in the adaptation as it was co-written by Richard Matheson’s daughter.

Dorky accountant Matt Frewer is visited by a hot blonde client who is shown to his office.  Before he gets there, she notices his dead wife’s picture on the desk and morphs into a brunette (Michelle Johnson) more his type.  Although, her original incarnation seemed to be the universal every-guy’s type.  It clearly works, because about 100 frames later, they are a married couple.

olfirstanniversary17They are having dinner with another couple to celebrate the first anniversary of both marriages and it is immediately evident that something is amiss.  The other man is Clint Howard — it is not going too far out on a limb to say these two guys are . . . er, that is to say . . . uh, their faces have a lot of character.  It is clear that the couples were cast so that the women would appear to be out of the guys’ league.

That night at 3:04, Frewer awakens to find his wife typing away downstairs.  He sneaks up behind her and kisses her neck, but recoils saying she tastes like something dead.   She runs to the shower and begins roughly scrubbing down.  Frewer enters the bathroom and we sadly get just a backal view of Michelle.  When he looks at her reflection in the mirror, however, he sees a monster.

olfirstanniversary39Frewer goes to a doctor to check his sense of taste.  Now he can’t taste his wife at all. He swings by Howard’s house and learns that he has left his wife Barbara.  As Frewer drives off, Michelle strangely appears.  They are realizing that their marriages can only last about a year.

Howard calls Frewer and they meet in the park.  A disheveled Howard says that he began seeing and smelling strange things about Barbara.  Having morphed into a different body (for no good reason), Barbara confronts him, but he runs away and is hit by a car.

Soon, Johnson can’t keep up the illusion any more and Frewer begins to see her for the disgusting alien that she is.  Maintaining the illusion for more than one year is just not possible.  She confesses that she and Barbara crashed on earth.

Sure, now we get the frontal shot.olfirstanniversary51

Post-Post:

  • The mystery here is why Michelle Johnson didn’t have a bigger career.  At least the Matheson family liked her — she is also in an upcoming Tales From the Crypt episode written by Richard Christian Matheson.
  • Cost of Canadian-release DVD: $20.  Not having to deal with Hulu: Priceless!
  • But Hulu, as I recall, still sucks.

Ray Bradbury Theater – Usher II (S4E5)

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Almost a triple-spin.  I tried to re-read the original The Fall of the House of Usher, but just couldn’t get through it.  I did give it a skim while waiting in line at Comcast, though. Sadly, I did not have War and Peace or Moby Dick handy.

rbtusherii04The episode starts off with a nice self-referential joke.  Two men — in Bradbury’s universe, presumably firemen  — shovel books into an incinerator.  It is then set to Fahrenheit 451.  Sadly it is all downhill from there.

Stendahl (Patrick Macnee) is reading aloud from Poe’s short story.  I would guess much to his architect’s relief, he stops after the first interminable sentence and shuts the book. The architect, Bigelow, has just built “the 2nd House of Usher” for Stendahl.  By his design it is desolate and terrible and bleak.

bradbury02The names Usher and Poe mean nothing to Bigelow as all Poe’s books were banned and burned 20 years earlier.  Hawthorne, Steinbeck, Vonnegut are all cited as being burned, but one of those things is not like the others.  Tales of fantasy and horror were forbidden — not sure that applies to Steinbeck; unless you are a rabbit.  Or an Okie.

Macnee has filled Usher II with forbidden films and forbidden books.  This draws a visit from Inspector Garrett of the Division of Moral Climates.  They can’t allow Stendahl’s “haunted house” to stand — any sort of horror or fantasy or departure from realism has been outlawed.  Garrett says the house will have to be torn down.  Macnee kills the inspector and replaces him with a robot.

Inspector Gadget — er Garrett — goes back to his office and invites the rest of the Division of Moral Climates to enjoy a fantastical going-away party at Usher II before they tear it down.  Even in the future year of 2005, rules are for little people.  Turns out the Inspector had sent an android to Usher II — so the human Inspector is still alive.  At the party, he witnesses, what I assume is a Masque of the Red Death costume ball.  Also a Pit.  Also a Pendulum.  Also a Premature Burial.  Also etc.  All based on Poe works burned by the Mortal Climates people.

rbtusherii11Stendahl leads Garrett to the basement. Unfortunately for the Inspector, Stendahl is carrying an Amontillado, and he is walled-in just as in Poe’s story.  Macnee jabs him for not having read the story and thus knowing that this was coming, telling him “goose-stepping morons like yourself should try reading books instead of burning them.”  OK, that was Indiana Jones’ father, but the sentiment is the same.

Outside, Stendahl reads aloud the last sentence of Poe’s story and a carriage carries him away from Usher II.

The episode is pretty faithful to the short story except, oh yeah, it takes place on MARS!  It is included in The Martian Chronicles.  The short story is set in 2005 whereas the episode is set in 2125.  I understand it had to be post-dated since the “future” date of 2005 was getting pretty close, but why was it pushed back so far?  Living to see speech codes and political correctness, surely Bradbury didn’t see things getting better.

Strangely, in 2005 on Mars, the story ends with Stendahl leaving Usher II in a helicopter. In 2125 on Earth, he leaves in a horse-drawn carriage.  Maybe the Moral Climate Change people showed up too.

Post-Post:

  • First published in the April 1950 issue of Thrilling Wonder stories as Carmnival of Madness.  I suspect it did not originally take place on Mars, and Bradbury added a few words to shoe-horn it into da Chronicles.
  • It seems pretty obvious that the main character was named after Stendhal, a founder of the realism movement in literature.  But why change the spelling? That’s not very realistic.