Starting off with a great title like that, this is TZ’s to blow.
Psychologist Dr. Mallory Craig is arriving for his first day at Crest Ridge Sanitarium. The narrator tells us, “There is a terror behind those cold institutional walls that nothing in his education has prepared him for.” So maybe they have a Republican working there.
Nurse Becky is the underpaid woman at every company that actually runs things. She shows him his office and hands him his mail. Reviewing the files that afternoon, Dr. Craig asks her about only one patient, Sharon Miles (coincidentally the hottest patient in the joint). She self-committed after constantly rearranging furniture and demanding to sleep in an all-white room (hey, maybe she’s the Republican!). [1]
She is frequently repainting her entire room whenever she sees a spot, she dresses only in solid colors, and only ventures out for meals and counseling. Nurse Becky says she has never seen a patient so utterly terrified. That night, Dr. Craig stops by her room. She is sitting in a white room with one white chair and one lamp. A non-Becky nurse brings her some fresh blankets with a pattern and she freaks out.
Why the constantly changing look?
The next day, Sharon makes a rare excursion to Dr. Craig’s office to apologize. Before she can enter, though, he must roll up a patterned carpet and put it aside. She explains that it wasn’t the blankets that scared her; it was the patterns. The patterns on blankets, on walls, and on ceilings sometime form faces. Dr. Craig explains, “That is the way the brain works; it tries to bring order out of chaos.” [2]
She recalls lying in bed one Sunday watching shadows on the wall cast by the trees outside her window. The shadows formed into a face which seemed to be pressing outwardly from the wall. She is horrified, thinking it is looking right at her, but it disappears when the phone rings. Great, but who was calling her at 3 AM?
Dr. Craig suggests maybe she just imagined it was looking at her. Sharon compares it to crossing a street where a car is waiting for a light. Even if she can’t clearly see the driver’s eyes, she can feel them on her ass; or something like that. She dismisses Dr. Craig’s explanations and says, “It’s trying to kill me!”
They continue talking the next day. She describes how she saw more faces and how they seemed to form in the patterns of ceilings, wallpaper, shadows and “the doodles of my 7 year old son.” That’s why she stopped wearing patterns. “That’s how they get through.” She thinks they are whispering about her, looking in from somewhere else.
In a confusing edit, she is tossing and turning in bed. The headboard and room are very simple. Then we cut to her reading in a much more stylish bed and homey bedroom. So I guess she is dreaming of herself at home in bed, just like the doctor does except not on all fours. She turns off the light and sees shadows on the wall and hears muffled whispering. As she approaches them, faces and heads begin stretching the wall like latex, their heads and faces protruding menacingly. She runs to her son’s room. He is OK, but the entities write on his wall: TELL NO ONE. She wakes up screaming in the sanitarium.
She immediately calls Dr. Craig and says she wants to tell him everything. She thinks she knows what they want. The next morning at the hospital, Becky tells him Sharon had another episode last night. She was screaming, pounding on the door to get out. I guess we didn’t see that one, we just saw the one in the flashback.
He runs to her room, but finds her in the hall. She serenely says she realizes she was just being silly last night. She says she was wrong to abandon her son and husband. Wait, who? She’s married? Where was her husband during the flashback? Did he go on a business trip and leave little Bobby with this maniac?
She congratulates Dr. Craig for this therapeutic breakthrough. She even plans on checking out that day. He admits being shocked, although maybe that was just the part about her having a husband. She is even wearing a nice pleated skirt and a colorful scarf. He suggests a session just to wrap things up, but she curtly cuts him off and says they’re done.
He stops by her room to help her pack. In her room, he hears strange noises. Sharon claims to hear nothing. After he leaves, she looks at a water stain on the ceiling. She hears voices and sees a face straining to get through. It says, “She’s one of them! That’s not me!” She smiles.
This should have been a chilling resolution. To be fair, Deborah Raffin’s (Sharon) smile at the end is perfect, and she is great throughout. As usual, though, the score is blah and the second the narration begins, any suspense is killed.
Damir Andrei (Dr. Craig) had an interesting style. It sometimes seemed like they were trying to light Nurse Becky as evil. If so, it was ineffective and unnecessary.
Even with the flaws, I like that it still has me thinking after the episode is over. Who are those people? What will happen to Sharon in the wall? What shenanigans will fake Sharon get into? Will her son notice?
Other Stuff:
- [1] It’s so easy. No wonder everyone on TV does it.
- [2] He is talking about pareidolia, which well-worth googling.
- I kept calling him Dr. Craig because I was going to mock his first name. Unless you wrote Le Morte D’Arthur, Mallory is a girl’s name.
- Sadly, I was unable to work in this classic:
The scariest part about this episode is the first scene where the geeky computer dweeb eats a candy bar, then carefully folds the wrapper up length-ways exactly as I do. Luckily, this compulsive OCD lunatic tucks one end into the other to make a ring, whereas I tie the wrapper in a knot. Totally different.
They are interrupted by Nelson’s new neighbor Jane knocking. The phone company did not show up, and she wants to use the phone. In possibly the only gag that works in the episode, Nelson opens his door with the still-yapping Eddie behind it. He invites Jane in. When he closes the door, Eddie is gone. Bravo! And not just because of the absence of Eddie. But partly that.
OK, Gene Morton is in a maximum security prison. But instead of working in the laundry for $.15/hour, he seems to work in the clean room of an electronics lab in the prison. And one of his neighbors has a saxophone in his cell. Toto, I don’t think we’re in 
Lawrence, who I thought could not be more obnoxious than when he played the sax in the cell-block, is a motormouth punk. During a basketball game, he accidentally breaks the 
Special commendation is also deserved for the MEMS. This was almost 20 years ago, and they look great both as the glowing orbs and in the close-up shots. Under the microscope, the tiny propellers, arms and clamps were absolutely convincing as being tiny units that could do almost anything.
Truman Bradley has a visitor. 
The conference room in DC is so close to the capitol dome that it must be on top of the senate. SecDef Sturgis explains that a new fuel has been developed that will enable a man to go to Mars and return. He is given one year to determine whether humans can survive in space. If it is possible, Arnold will select and train the crew. Janice is not thrilled about this. However, Arnold explains how important it is and offers her a job evaluating the volunteers.
He frankly tells the group of other dangers. He name-checks 
The group is put into a small cabin to simulate the close quarters of space travel. They quickly begin getting on each other’s nerves. They are subjected to other tests of physical stress and endurance. Sadly, one of the women drops out, and one of the men is thrown out for sabotaging the tests. The crew is not shorthanded, though, as Joyce returns and she and Arnold take their places. The final shot is them blasting off to Mars. It ain’t a 
Georgia is belting out a tune as Bert Haber plays piano at a swanky nightclub. And she’s pretty dang good. For a change, a singer on TV that I would pay to see. But I went to see Bob Dylan this week, so my judgment is not to be trusted.
Bert goes backstage to Georgia’s dressing room. Apparently this writer is too smart for me:
As Georgia walks through the crowd to the stage for her second show, Dorf grabs her hand. He stands up, showing himself to be a few inches shorter than her. He is so persistent that she finally pours a martini over his head. Bert runs to her defense. There is a scuffle and Dorf falls to the floor. He, Luca and Clemenza beat it out of the club. Bert goes to the bar and orders a double. A well-dressed goon tells him Mr. Dorf recommends he buy some insurance.