Torment (2013)

torment01The movie opens with a prologue of a family at dinner time.  Mom and the daughter seem nice.  For no reason, the filmmakers opted to make Dad an asshole.

What is the obsession this genre has with making the victims assholes?  OK, it’s fun to see bad guys get what they deserve, but this guy is offed after we know him for 30 seconds.  Maybe he had a bad day.  Maybe he found out this morning he had cancer, maybe his family are the awful ones and we just happened to catch them in a civil moment.  Yeah, he is a jerk, but did he really deserve to be murdered?  You have to make a case in order for that to be cathartic, and it isn’t going to be made in 30 seconds for a character who isn’t even around long enough to have a name.

On the other hand, you can make someone likable and sympathetic pretty quickly.  Then kill them.

So, his put-upon wife is murdered, he is murdered, and the killers are approaching the teenage daughter when we cut away.  This prologue tells us that the killers are not making moral judgments, they just kill for no purpose.  Well, that’s not exactly true, but that sets up a twist at the end.

torment02We flash-forward to a much happier family driving to their cabin in the woods. Well, the young son is kind of jerky, but his father has just remarried after the death of his mother, so there is a solid pre-fab back-story for his jerky attitude.  However, I’m kind of a jerk because I have to point how how bad this kid’s performance is.

They arrive at the cabin which turns out to a huge house.  It all seems great until they see evidence that there have been squatters there — messy beds, dirty dishes.  Hey, maybe I have squatters at my place, too.

The killers have taken the heads off of the kid’s stuffed animals and made masks of them.  The masks and lack of motive have lead many people to make comparisons to The Strangers and You’re Next.  These are pretty superficial points, and apply to a lot of movies.  Yeah, there are some similarities, but Tormented is its own movie.

torment03Really no major complaints.  There is not much story to latch onto, or recap, or mock, or criticize.  It is mostly an exercise in style, and moving the pieces around the board.  It worked well enough for me.  I like the callback for the motivation.  The other twist just didn’t do much for me.  More of a reveal, really, and there really was no substance set-up for it to knock down.

The kid was not very good, and Katherine Isabelle was only OK.  She seems to have more presence when she has something to work with like lycanthropy or being a psycho medical student.  As a Mom, she was kind of blah, and became irritating because half her dialogue seemed to be yelling for her husband, “Coryyyy!”  This would still make a better drinking game than “Wallllllt!” on Lost, though, because you really need to already be drunk to sit through that.

Outer Limits – If These Walls Could Talk (S1E19)

Derek and Nadia are making out on a sofa in an old abandoned house.  Derek hears moaning upstairs.  Since Nadia is not a ventriloquist, he goes to investigate.  He screams for help and Nadia goes up to find him.  We don’t see what she sees, but we hear it — the demonic laughter of something that pulls her to her death.

Outer Limits is getting out on the thin ice again.  The forays into religion early in the season were not always successful, and the apparent entry into the haunted house genre had me worried.

olwalls01

Oh STFU, Outer Limits — this isn’t science-fiction, it’s economics-fiction.

Physicist turned professional skeptic Dwight Schultz is pecking away on a typewriter, watching himself on a TV talk show.  He had appeared with Derek’s mother Alberta Watson to discuss her son’s disappearance in the old house.

His doorbell rings and Watson is there.  She offers Schultz $5,000 to go to the old house with her.  They drive out to the house and Schultz is able to offer plausible  explanations for the mysterious sounds they hear.  Soon, however, they both hear sounds that can’t be so easily explained.

That night, Watson has a few drinks and sees her dead son morphing out of the wall.  In examining the wall, Schultz finds a hidden door and kicks his way in.  Inside, they find a meteorite which apparently animates inanimate objects.

I’m not a stickler for defining science-fiction, but this is a pretty thin pretense for shoehorning a haunted house story into a science-fiction series.  Like all meteorites in TV and media, the stone looks like a pomegranate with shiny metallic “seeds” on the hollow center.

olwalls02She later sees Derek in the house again, or so she thinks.  The entity has completely assumed Derek’s form and fully emerged into the hallway.  He tries to lure her into the wall.  Apparently having seen Spank the Monkey, the entity knows Watson will do anything for her son.

Schultz arrives to save the day by hosing the house down with alcohol which has a disorienting effect on the entity — ha, it thinks it’s people!  As the alcohol takes effect, the house starts melting like a cross between House of Wax and Poltergeist.

Overall, very blah.  I was immediately off-put by that idiotic T-Shirt.  I didn’t come here for lefty propaganda by a bunch of Hollywood 1%ers (filming in Canada to dodge union rates), and I didn’t come here for a haunted house story.

olwalls03Post-Post:

  • Let’s hoist a flagon of house -melting alcohol for Nadia.  Her disappearance is barely mentioned other than to say that her parents couldn’t have cared less.  She seemed like a nice girl.
  • Guess I’m a softy — I would have liked to see Derek and Nadia come out of this alive; and in Nadia’s case, naked.
  • Alberta Watson was also briefly Jack Bauer’s boss on 24.  Unfortunately, I think she was stuck in a doomed role that squandered her abilities.
  • Hulu sucks.

The Tortured (2010)

tortured01The film starts off on an overpass where a man is frantically calling 9-1-1 about the kidnapping of his son.  His wife arrives home not knowing why the police are there, so I guess the husband didn’t bother to call and break the news.  The police detective does break the news in a very jarring manner.

In fact, almost everything seems off about this opening.  The leads, Elise and Craig do not register believable emotions, the staging is awkward, and the music does not work at all.

Things don’t get much better with the introduction of the kidnapper.  Bill Moseley has been in a 1,000 of these joints, but doesn’t fare too well here.  He has rouged his cheeks and is wearing a tiara as he yells at the kidnappee.

A couple of on-the-ball cops arrest Moseley in the first 10 minutes; but then the movie is named Torture, not Manhunt, so you kind of expect that.  Tragically, the boy is already dead.  This triggers a flashback of him being abducted right out of the backyard as Craig witnesses through a window.  He gives chase on foot, then by car, but loses them on the overpass.

Moseley works out a plea agreement to disclose where other bodies are buried in order to get a sentence that could result in him serving only 10 years. During a prison transfer, Craig and Elise drug the guards at a gas station and manage to steal the van with Moseley inside.  It takes much longer than expected for the drugs to kick in, yet when the van pulls over it is conveniently close to the dirt road turn-off to the torture-shack.

In a freak accident, Craig flips the van over a cliff avoiding a doe, a deer, a female deer. Luckily Craig and Moseley survive.  Well, not so lucky for Moseley.  Craig and Elise carry him to a cabin in the woods and explain how they are going to torture him.

tortured03The next 45 minutes are torture; and not just for Moseley.  Cigarette burns, needle to the ear drum, cramping drugs,  It would almost be unwatchable in an effective movie. Here it is cringe-inducing, but bearable.  Craig & Elise’s poor performances take some of the edge off.  Also, it is hard to take them seriously when Craig makes a point of showing Moseley that the key to his restraints is hanging on a nail just above his head. There is fore-shadowing, and then there is fore-eclipsing.

At one point, Moseley claims to have lost his memory in the crash and to not know who he is or why he is being tortured.  That brings up a fascinating dilemma — even if you are OK with torturing the man who murdered their son, is it still OK if he doesn’t know why he is being tortured?

Elise is not troubles by such nuances.  They try to jog his memory by tightening his foot in a vice, which always works for me.  They scream at him to say their son’s name.  He holds out much longer than I could have, but finally — muddying the finale — screams out the boy’s name.

tortured04We knew that the key would eventually be used, and Moseley manages to loosen his chains enough to reach the key which Craig brilliantly left in sight and within reach on a hook just above his head.

He makes it to the bedroom, but Elise hits him with a pipe.  As they are dragging him back the cellar, he kicks Craig down the stairs and runs off.  He is pretty spry for a guy whose foot was just turned to jelly in a vice and had his big toe cut off.

By this time, thanks to a nosy neighbor, the cops are closing in on the cabin.  Naturally, it turns out there were 2 prisoners in the van and the couple grabbed the wrong guy. They do look a lot alike; apparently even to a couple whose son he murdered, who have seen him in the courtroom and in newspapers and TV everyday for the past few months and who wanted nothing more than for him to die.

Sadly, the ending is thoroughly botched.  I can’t blame the writing; there could have been some intriguing twists and ambiguity in the right hands.  But it is fumbled so badly here that it is just frustrating.

tortured06I’m even willing to suspend disbelief and say that the prisoner was so injured and bloody from the crash that they didn’t see their mistake.  But how did this poor bastard yell out their son’s name?  The online typing heads are at odds over whether the couple mentioned it in his presence. Certainly, he could have heard it on the news or maybe Moseley bragged about it in prison.  But then, what of the amnesia?

In his confession written before he hangs himself, he apologizes for his crime, leading us to believe he was the murderer.  Or did the innocent man now believe he was guilty due to the torture?  I think it is clear what they were going for, they just bungled it.

Why did the killer hang around the house?  Why did the police not go directly to the house where they were specifically told that he might be?  Why did they stop looking for the 2nd prisoner after they found the first one?

Why do the police cruise past the turn-off at the end?  Is this back-up troops coming, then why are they driving past?  Is it the police taking the prisoner back, then why aren’t they coming out of the dirt road?

Do Craig and Elise know that it was the wrong man?

The sad thing is that in the hands of a competent director, this could have been made twisty and fascinating.  Director Robert Lieberman has a lot of credits, so maybe it was time and budget constraints.  Certainly he did not have much to work with in his lead actors.

Post-Post:

  • If this was meant to be an anti-torture statement, that is yet another level that it fails on.
  • The lead actors both have extensive resumes, which makes their work here even more baffling.  Maybe they were just miscast.
  • This is Marek Posival’s only writing credit, but he is active in the business.  Oddly, for the guy who wrote The Tortured, he sure does like Christmas:

tortured02

Ray Bradbury Theater – The Wonderful Death of Dudley Stone (S3E7)

Yet another first-time director.  Are they picking these guys up in front of Home Depot?

Like so many RBT episodes, there is an interesting idea here, but it isn’t well executed, or maybe it just works better on the printed page.

Dudley Stone (John Saxon) is having a book-signing for his latest masterpiece.  He recognizes one of the people in line as a struggling writer John Oatis Kendall.  Stone asks how he would like the book inscribed and his handed a note that says “I have come here to kill you.”

But Kendall is paying full price for the book, so Stone says, “Easily done” and begins writing inside the cover.  Psyche!  He writes, “Come see me tomorrow and kill me then!! — D.S.”  effectively shutting him down and screwing him out of an autograph.

The next scene takes place 20 years later where Kendall, having not aged a day, is present at an annual gathering to memorialize Dudley Stone who disappeared after their first encounter.  No one seems to know if Stone is dead or alive.  Kendall, now a successful writer, speaks up to say that he murdered Stone out of jealousy for his talent.

rbtdudley05In a flashback to the day after their meeting at the book-signing, we see that Kendall somehow intuited that Stone’s “Kill me then” comment was an invitation to come out to the house, meet the wife and kids.  Kendall travels out to the seaside home and is warmly greeted by Stone.  Even better, it is Stone’s 40th birthday (even though John  Saxon was 53 at the time).

Saxon is strangely encouraging of Kendall’s plan.  Kendall explains his jealousy of     Stone’s talent and volume of output, “all of it excellent! “.  Novels, poetry, essays, stageplays, screenplays, lectures on city planning, architecture, etc.  Kendall says this flood of masterful output has “reduced everyone else to pygmies.”

“Agreed, agreed,” Stone offers magnanimously.  He seems nonplussed by the entire rant and responds, “I’ve heard your reasons for wanting to kill me, let me give my reasons for letting you do bloody murder.”  He motions at all the books he’s never read, symphonies yet to be heard, films yet to be seen, sculptures waiting to be shaped, paintings waiting to be painted — is there anything this guy can’t do?   I’m starting to hate him myself.  He goes on like this at length — those are the reasons to “die.'”

Faking his death will remove him from Kendall’s competitive world and allow him time to enjoy these pursuits, just like Elvis Presley, Andy Kaufman and Eddie (of Cruisers fame).

rbtdudley12

I’m no tree-hugger, but this is just wrong!

Stone pulls all of his unfinished works out of various boxes, desks and drawers.  Together, they go to a cliff and — in a shocking display of littering — heave reams of paper into the sea.

Back in the future, Kendall calls Stone to give him permission to begin “living” again, but Stone is perfectly happy being “dead.”  He realized 20 years ago that his well had run dry, his latest mediocre works would have have tarnished his legacy.  He was happy to have a chance to go out on a Costanzian high-note.

In a nice twist, he asks the now-successful Kendall if there is anyone out there now that might similarly see him as a threat.  He sees hungry eyes looking at him, and realizes that he now has the same burden that Jack Klugman brought on himself in TZ’s A Game of Pool.

The episode reasonably combines a couple of characters from the print version.  In the story, a man named Douglas (Bradbury’s middle name) tracks Stone down.  Stone then just tells him the story of his encounter with Kendall, who had been a friend since childhood.

Post-Post:

  • LOTR Connection:  None.
  • His fan club, which seems to be made up of writerly types, are no brainiacs.  They were unable to determine whether Stone was alive despite him still living in the same house 20 years later.  C’mon, Richard Bachman was harder to find.  At least Eddie grew a beard (not sure of the facial hair status of the Cruisers).

Antisocial (2013)

antisocial01A couple of teenage girls are working on a video blog about fashion when one of them commits the faux pas of bleeding from the face after Labor Day.  Girl # 2 is concerned about girl # 1. Then girl # 2 is concerned about girl # 2 as her friend attacks her. Girl # 2 gets the upperhand and uses it to club her friend to death with a blow-dryer.

Next we meet Sam (presumably short for Samantha), a hot Angelina Joliesque college student who is trying to reach her boyfriend.  When they finally connect via a Skype-like app, he uses that opportunity to dump her.  My sympathies were immediately with her, but when I saw her laptop was not an MacBook, I was hers.

She goes to a party that night which is is just an awful scene with alternating so-mo / fast-mo, techno noise, a wacky drunk guy of the type no one thinks is funny after age 14, and a self-centered diva with self-esteem far out of proportion to her looks.  This scene is jarringly out of synch with everything that precedes it; and, fortunately, also with everything that follows it.

antisocial08

L to R: Token minority, beta male, diva, alpha male, hottie

The gang sees reports of violence and suicides on the news.  Being young and stupid, their main concern is whether to cancel their New Year’s Eve party.  That discussion is resolved when a zombie rams his arm through the front door and grabs Sam.  Another discussion in the bedroom is resolved when a zombie breaks in through the window. Luckily, token black party-goer Steve is able to hurl him off a balcony.

antisocial09When 9-1-1 has a recorded message, they know shit is real, this not being Detroit. They hear lots of gunfire, sirens and crowds as civilization breaks down.  Hmmm, maybe this is Detroit.  They take the precaution of boarding up the windows and doors.  They also watch the video blog of the fashion-girls, so it is nice to see there is a callback to that scene.

One of the symptoms is hallucinations.  When token black Steve starts to hallucinate, it is interesting to see them from his perspective.  Steve goes full zombie and the others have to kill him.  Steve’s diva girlfriend goes down next, and not in the good way.  She also sees the hallucinations and has a very effective — and festive — turn for the worse.

Turns out the Facebook doppleganger in the film — Social Redroom — is to blame.  Using subliminal message to track users, it had a few side-effects.  There is a cure, or at least vaccine, which is almost worse than the disease as it is administered with a power drill to the skull.

I can highly recommend this movie despite some serious problems.  Most importantly, the movie is just awful to look at.  I am baffled why so many horror movies, especially low budget ones, think it is a good idea to desaturate the color out of the movie.

The acting is generally OK.  It pains me to say the weak link here is Sam.  She is beautiful — from some angles, downright amazing — but just doesn’t bring much else to the role; especially in the later scenes where she needs to step up, it just doesn’t happen.  I think she probably needs a stronger director than she had here — it wasn’t so much mis-steps in her performance as no-steps.

Most importantly, the film had ideas.  I really enjoyed the ending scenario in which shit just kept on piling on right up to the last frame.  This was a good one.

antisocial06

Kind of spoilery, but it’s basically the cover art.

Post-Post:

  • On second thought, maybe the MacBook Apple logo was hidden by a cover; it’s a start.
  • The IMDb description says the outbreaks are happening unbeknownst to the group in the house — this really could not be more wrong.  They see what is going on in the outside world via a peephole in the door, TV news, social media, webcasts, Skype, basically every form of non-print mass media.
  • But I’m sure the newspaper had it covered the next day.