The episode begins with a prolonged close-up of a nameless smoking hot blonde (interrupted by a pan to her rack).  Blonde, sophisticated, well-dressed and well-coiffed with a mischievous wink.  Then we see her in the shitter.

But that’s OK too, as she is using the alone-time to practice her “o-sounds” for later that night.  Someone enters the restroom and cuts off the light. When the blonde complains, the stall door flies open and she is attacked with an axe.

Roger is driving home and stops to help a woman whose pickup has broken down.  Because a) it is raining, b) the buses have stopped running for the night, c) Roger owns a nearby cabin, d) his marriage is on the rocks, and e) the stranded motorist is Brooke Shields, he offers his cabin to her. But mostly “e”.

Tipping his hand a little, Roger stops off at a small store in the mountains to buy some oysters.  This doesn’t strike me as a place that would have fresh seafood, so maybe he is going for mountain oysters.  Maybe they do stock oysters, because this log cabin of a store also carries Cristal Champagne.  The clerk — the always fun Michael J. Pollard — catches Roger up on the local news — a stolen truck and a woman hacked to bits in a restaurant.

At the cabin, Brooke puts on some fancy clothes.  Downstairs, Roger says he wants to put something on her that belonged the Catherine the Great.  I was thinking a saddle, but the kinky stuff comes later.  It is a necklace.

Over dinner, he asks her why she stole the truck.  She says she stole the truck to come looking for her cheating husband and that she “took care of” the bimbo.  Seconds later, Brooke is tying Roger’s wrists to the bedposts.  Darn the luck, his wife shows up before he can do any rogering, so he hustles Brook out onto the balcony.

The ending is a nice couple of twists and backed by soaring opera that gets crazier and the story gets crazier.  It is all over-the-top good fun as TFTC should be.  There is a minor quibble with some logistics involving the door, but why dwell on that?

Michael J. Pollard really has nothing to do, but just showing up makes the episode more fun.  Perry King starts off solid and ends up great.  And Brooke Shields has always been misunderestimated — she’s just great here as the flannel-wearing thief.

This is a good one.

Post-Post:

• Title Analysis:  Good episode, but another pathetic title — unless the girl practicing her orgasms in the restaurant bathroom was named Dawn.