We open in with John Marriott in prison, so we know this is another episode set outside of the United States where assault, looting, vandalism, and arson are now legal.  Before I digress there, let me digress here:  This is now 5 out of 11 OSB episodes that are set overseas.  Am I missing something?  I didn’t catch-on that Ray Bradbury Theatre had moved production to New Zealand until I noticed 2 Orcs in the 3rd season credits.

Also, I notice that the foreign locations (which will be 6 out of 12 next week) are always in Western Europe.  No paranormal activity in Africa or Asia, fellas?  Even host John Newland tries to come off like a Brit, pronouncing “human record” as “human hhre-KORD“.  John, dude, you were born in Cincinatti! ^[1]  Give it up!

Anyhoo, Marriott is scheduled to be hanged in London that afternoon.  I’d like to think his trial was that morning.  From his cell, he can see the gallows being prepared for the big event.  No, wait, I hope his trial was yesterday so the hammering kept him up all night.  Marriott is nervous and jumpy about the hanging which is in about half an hour.  In a very obnoxious few minutes, he describes his life and crime.  He ends up crying and screaming, “I don’t want to die!”  

The good guys enter the cell and waste a swig of brandy on him.  They walk him up the stairs of the gallows, and put a sack over his head to prevent COVID-19.  Then the noose is tightened around his neck.  The trap door is opened, and his body falls through, thus ending the comedy portion of our program.  Sadly the rope has broken, and more sadlier, he has survived the fall.

Marriott wakes up in the infirmary instead of Hell.  The warden, my kind of guy, is ready to try again right away.  Marriott says, “You’re wasting your time, guvnuh.”  He confidently tells the men they can’t kill him no matter what they do.  Inexplicably they let him eat breakfast before the next try.  At least they don’t waste any more brandy.  

Once again, they escort Marriott through the prison, but this time he is arrogant in his certainty that he will not die.  He even does a little dance.  They march him up the steps to the high platform.  They put the noose around his neck, and he tells them they are wasting their time.  The executioner pulls the switch, but the trap door is stuck.  Marriott laughs at them.  Loudly, mockingly, jeeringly.

Throw him off the side!!!  It’s really high — just throw him off the side!!!

But no, they take him back to his cell, and the House of Lords decide to release him.  He is even more emboldened and obnoxious after his 2nd reprieve.  He later explains that when they put the sack over his head, he had a vision; or maybe it was that garlic omelet. ^[2] “The devil himself” told Marriott that he would “die at the feet of a lion”.  Even when his murder victim’s brother tries to shoot him in a pub, the gun jams.

Inexplicably, except for being extremely drunk, Marriott goes to the zoo.  He goes directly to the lion’s cage and begins taunting the beast.  The zookeepers chase him off and he falls down a long flight of steps.  The camera pans up to show a statue of a lion above him.

As always, this is a fantastic-looking show.  The shot of the gallows through Marriott’s window is magnificent. ^[3] My other frequent comment about the weakness of OSB stories doesn’t really apply here.  This feels more like an urban legend.  It is served up with the requisite three incidents to establish it, and even throws in little twist.

Alfred Ryder as Marriott is excruciating, though.   Whether Panicky Pierre ^[4] in the beginning, or laughing maniacally at his luck, or hamming it up arrogantly in later scenes, he is brutal to watch.  Most others, including John Newland, think this is one of OSB’s best, so I’m willing to blame my own general misanthropy.  

I rate it 7.5 steps beyond.

Other Stuff:

• [1] More likely it is a Transatlantic Accent.
• [2] Advice to future pandemic survivors:  Don’t have chili dogs for lunch and plan on wearing that same mask all afternoon.
• [3] Two words I have never spoken aloud: Fantastic and Magnificent.  If I ever even write “marvelous”, just shoot me (unless referring to Marvin Hagler.)
• [4] I thought this was London.  Forget it, he’s rolling.
• Alfred Ryder (Marriott) was in the first episode of Star Trek.
• My Marriott memories.