Now this is more like it. No one will ever call this “one of the best” yet I can imagine this would have very effectively creeped me out as a child.
This is the city, as Jack Webb used to say. Gridlock on the freeways, wrecking balls demolishing buildings, jackhammers jacking off — just a nightmare of noise. Even in elderly Frank Standish’s Thrift Shop there is no reprieve. An electric eye announces visitors with a loud bell, a dog barks constantly for no reason, his partner Mrs. Moore (Zsa Zsa Gabor) plays obnoxious stock-and-roll music. This could drive a man to murder.
Elderly Ellen Chase enters the shop with a mirror she hopes to hock. Strangely, the mirror has been painted over with gray paint. Standish (Arthur O’Connell, the other priest in The Poseidon Adventure) begins slowly chiseling away the gray paint. Even through the small area he has cleared, he can see this is no ordinary mirror.
Mrs. Chase comes back the next day to the displeasure of Zsa Zsa who doesn’t approve of her socializing with Standish. The old man continues scraping away the paint.
Finally, the last bits are removed and they are amazed at the lifelike other-worldly landscape. They are even more amazed when Zsa Zsa’s cat runs through the frame and down the path in the painting. Seconds later, it comes screeching back out, scared to death.
Zsa Zsa decides to buy out Standish’s share of the partnership, and apparently he can’t refuse. This is especially disconcerting to him as Chase and Standish seem to have used the back room for some hanky-panky. And I mean really disconcerting as Zsa Zsa, at about 60, is the youngster in this group.
Tired of Zsa Zsa’s dog constantly yapping, and none too crazy about Zsa Zsa’s yapping either, Chase hurls the dog’s ball into the painting, sending him running to fetch it. Even better, Zsa Zsa follows to fetch her dog.
She seems strangely oblivious to the fact she just stepped through a portal into dimension filled with bright colors, pointy volcanoes, strange plants. She continues further into the strange land calling for her dog.
What she succeeds in attracting, however, are dinosaurs. As they begin closing in on her, Chase and Standish begin repainting the mirror, sealing her in. And her little dog, too.
The story lacks focus — much is made in establishing the loud, hectic atmosphere of the city and the shop — but that is disregarded and it is really the thought of losing their “bachelor’s boudoir” that motivates the geezers to condemn Zsa Zsa to death.
But the double mind-intercourses of 1) the mirror as a portal to another dimension, and 2) Zsa Zsa being sealed in this hostile world by the mere strokes of a brush make this a winner. It is especially fun to know that she is seeing them painting in the last bit of the mirror like Fortunato seeing Montresor placing the last brick in The Cask of Amontillado.
As frequently happens, the victim here is getting much worse than she deserves. But that doesn’t stop this from being fun stuff.
Post-Post:
- Twilight Zone Legacy: None. Although there is a definite Little Girl Lost vibe.
- Yikes — this from Vanity Fair: While Gabor was still married to Conrad Hilton, she admitted to having once had sex with her stepson.
It to me is great episode. Watch the syndication version now on metv, it shows what orginal aired should been.. i believe there wasnt much room in orginal aired, cause the stock foottage is from same source of ray harry hauson documentry, we see why the cat ran back. The vocanio the dinasours eating each other up .falling over cliff. More of arher oconnell looken in mirror. More city noise..more of za za gabor screaming,. Imaginanatiom we probally never see again i say arthur oconell wasnt to far. Of character in real.life..i work with old man who rezembled him felt he had his teeth kicked in. And if he had opertunity ,he and his kind wouldnt hezatate to smile at someone one else mizery .for all the years they felt kicked in teeth. Its called hatered that aint kind you can ring out of person.. its there from years of depressed. Even arthur oconnells im gentle men..let lady pass, and you shouldnt put up with that. Is so like realllity of people i experience . This is why its great episode.
The reason: In the original one-hour NBC airing, ‘The Painted Mirror’ was on the same show with ‘The Messiah Of Mott Street’ story. The “Mott Street” story was more lengthy than the one shown in the syndicated version, where “The Painted Mirror” was short in airing time. When the syndicated version was shown on the TV airwaves, the “Mott Story” story was condensed to fit the half-hour slot. Where as “The Painted Mirror” story was extended to fit its half-hour slot. To do this, extended scenes of Mrs. Moore’s cat and THE ANIMAL WORLD movie were added. Stock movie footage of the two dinosaurs in combat were included with the cat witnessing this from afar before it makes its screeching return from the mirror. Still a great episode regardless.
I just saw the painted mirror on ME TV. Zsa Zsa and her sister Eva (green acres) look almost exactly the same. This was a nice cozy, wacky episode. I enjoyed it.
Also, just saw it on ME TV..Poor Standish, all Zsa Zsa gave him for his share of the buy out was living expenses for several months.
Looks like the stock footage for a wide city scape is early construction of one of the World Trade Center buildings.
Sure, Mrs. Moore was a penny-pincher, and a tad unfeeling – but not enough exposition of her actually being cruel to justify her “end.” And what did her dog do to deserve the same fate, other than barking at Mr. Standish’s cat?
I realize production values were lacking in the 70’s, but the prehistorical world depicted on the other side of the mirror looked like something out of Land Of The Lost: I was half expecting to see Chaka, Holly and Will peering out of the foliage.
And where’s the context of this little shop still residing in a neighborhood clearly slated for ‘gentrification’? Wouldn’t a better scenario be that a ruthless developer would want to buy them both out? That would have made for a more interesting plot development, and subsequent denouement than this cheap shot, comeuppance resolution.
And now that his business partner is out of the way, what next? By his own admission, Mr. Standish was a lousy businessman, which is why he ended up saddled with Mrs. Moore in the first place – how was he gonna survive on his own now? I realize this is horror/sci-fi, but c’mon…..a little plausibility please. C+
Correction: Mrs. Moore owned both pets. Still……..