Are the stories getting thinner or did I just get fatter during the COVID-19 lock-down?  Yesterday’s One Step Beyond seemed pretty slight, but today’s Alfred Hitchcock Presents is like me going back to my old elementary school to vote and seeing my 747 hangar-sized cafeteria has shrunk to the size of an airport Bojangles.

William Benson is enjoying a weekend at the Pinto Casino in Las Vegas.  Or maybe not enjoying at this particular moment, because his chips are being depleted faster than the Ozone.  Hey, whatever happened to that crazy Ozone?  It was going to kill us all, now it never even calls.  In a move that seems reckless to a non-gambler like me, he puts his remaining chips on Black 11 ^[1] at the roulette table.  The ball lands on Red 25.

Benson takes it like a man, and leaves while he still has a few bucks in his pocket; so not really like most men.  He walks back to his room.  In the parking lot, he nearly trips over a huge money clip holding $92,000.  He looks around to see if anyone dropped it if anyone saw him.  Smoothly, he kneels, picks up the loot, and stuffs it in his pocket.  He goes back to his room alone with the $92,000.  Whereas, I would not have been alone and only had $91,000.

He counts out the cash, then looks for a place to hide it.  After trying a few locations, he decides on the brand new concept of stuffing the money in his mattress.  But ultimately, he sits in a chair with it in his hands from 3:50 am until he goes to the bank the next morning.  He rents a Safe Deposit Box for $1.75.  He pockets the other $.25 change to get a steak dinner and some back pills later.

Like a good citizen, he reports the found cash to the police.  He is shown in to see Captain Bone, which was my nickname in college.  Bone already knows about the cash, but he says $102,000 was reported missing!  He is dubious that Benson did not take the other $10k for expensive scotch or hookers or worse — waste it.  There are tense accusations and denials before Bone calls the owner of the cash.

Another upright citizen comes to meet Benson — Mr. Newsome, owner of the Pinto Casino.  Newsome, and even Bone in a reversal, could not be nicer.  They say the missing $10k will show up somewhere.  The 3 men go to the bank to pick up the cash.  Newsome is so pleased to have it, that he tells Benson to fly his wife Joyce in for a week to stay at the Pinto, all expenses paid!

Everything is cool.  Newsome drops Bone at the Police Station, and takes Benson to the Pinto.  Benson is set up with free drinks, and told the house will stake him at any game he wishes to play.  A few cigarettes later, Newsome calls him into his office and hands him the phone.  Benson’s wife Joyce says, “There are 2 awful men here”, then Newsome snatches the phone.  He says menacingly, “You fooled the police, but you didn’t fool me.  I don’t believe in holding grudges.  Be straight with me now, or something will happen to her.  It won’t be pretty.  Now let’s have my $10k you stole!”  Dunh dunh dunh.

I felt cheated when I watched the episode — it felt more like an act break than a real ending.  In reviewing it, however, I see I was wrong.  This is a masterful surprise ending, and a subverting of the usual AHP tropes.  Innocent people often get the shaft on AHP, but they aren’t usually the protagonist.  Benson has been nothing but honest and honorable for the entire episode.  That’ll teach him.

Other Stuff:

• [1] I was going to make a possibly racist reference to a player wearing #11 in the NFL.  Since I can’t name a single active player of any color or number, I went to Google.  The first few pages of football players were all soccer players, so I guess I’m possibly a nationalist too.  Finally, a site offered the best NFL player by jersey number.  They selected Larry Fitzgerald for the honor.  His blurb also mentioned he was an 11-time Pro-Bowler, and I actually thought, “Wow, he bowls too!”  What a maroon!  I have no idea if he is black or white, but isn’t that how it should be?
• Sadly I never got to reference the vice scene in Casino.  Just watching it again on You Tube, I don’t think I even want to link it.