Well, AHP wastes no time in establishing lumber yard manager Harry Wade as a prick.  First, they cast Walter Matthau who, while always entertaining, is typically an obnoxious jerk or know-it-all blowhard.  In comedies, he really shows his range by being a drunken loser or a bum.  However, imagine Jack Black or Seth Rogan in any role that Walter Matthau ever played and you will have a perfect illustration of how Hollywood has gone to shit. ^[1]

Within seconds we see him pawning some inferior wood off on a customer.  He is probably also pawning off some inferior wood on his girlfriend Helen who he treats like dirt.  He grudgingly takes her out to dinner.

After dinner, Harry drops Helen off.  She asks him to come in “just this once.”  He says he has things to do.  His excuse is that he doesn’t want to deal with that “meatball brother” of hers.  She asks if she can see him tomorrow night which makes me wonder if there is one other straight, single man in that town.  As if this would be a huge imposition, he says, “Maybe.”

Helen, the latest in a long line of AHP women who live with their brother, goes inside.  Her brother John says he plans on marrying his girlfriend in August.  This will leave Helen homeless.  The happy couple goes out again the next night.

And so it goes.  There are just too many moving parts to labor through.  Here are the other bullet points I jotted down:

• Wood / Erection pun.
• Harry needs $8k for only 24 hours like a Nigerian prince.
• Wood / Erection pun.
• Harry shows up at Helen’s office drunk.
• Wood / Erection pun.
• Helen steals money from her employer.
• Wood / Erection pun.
• Harry can’t repay the loan.
• Wood / Erection pun.

It’s a fine story and Matthau is always fun to watch.  Helen was kind of a drag and her brother was a non-entity.

Other Stuff:

• [1] I know I saw Billy Bob Thornton in the Bad News Bears reboot, but I don’t remember if I liked it.  He is one of the few genuine bright spots in Hollywood though, so even if he did it for the cash, it would be at least watchable.
• So what was the moral theft?  The money Harry swindled the mob out of?  If it were really moral, he would have returned it to the innocent shop-owners who coughed up protection money, anonymously with no-strings-attached.  Or let the exploited prostitutes work it off.