Either AHP is getter duller or I’m getting more exciting.

Mr. Hollister is guiding a tour through his small museum.  The last exhibit on the tour is a couple of skeletons.  He says one skeleton is an ancient “proto-pueblo” and the other is a “Caucasian”.  He describes the second one as being “very much like you and I.”

He escorts the group out and locks the doors.  He finds that one of the men has stayed behind.  Mr. Clovis — oh, I get it! — is admiring the collection of obsidian knives. ^[1]  He describes himself as an archeo-psychologist.  That is, he tries to divine the psyche of ancient man by his possessions.

He notices the Caucasian skeleton and profiles him.  Wait, he does know that is the Caucasian skeleton, right?  He says the large skull indicates he was an intelligent man who had trouble finding hats that fit.  He also deduces the man was athletic because he had the type of broken leg that is common in skiers.  The flaw in this logic is that Clovis has the same injury, but is decidedly not athletic.

Hollister shows Clovis through the other exhibits, pours some cocktails, then says the skeleton is was is was his son, Tim. ^[4]  He recalls the events that caused his son’s death.

Tim was hunting a fox.  He wasn’t really a hunter, he just wanted it for his collection.  He spots the fox running into Farmer McCaffery’s barn and follows it.  Little does he know McCaffery’s son is up in the hayloft also pursuing a fox.  Tim shoots the fox — the four-legged one.  McCaffery climbs down and busts Tim for walking into the unlocked barn like it was some kind of insurrection.

The girl yells down “Stealing pigeons!  That’s what he’s up to!”  What the heck?  Is McCaffery a pigeon farmer?

McCaffery Jr. is really a jerk.  He challenges Tim to a fight.  McCaffery grabs a pitchfork ^[2] and lunges at Tim.  So he Rittenhouses his attacker right in the eye, in a case of self-defense so clear that even MSNBC couldn’t miss it.

Tim is arrested for murder.  Although, the cops must have let him bring the dead fox with him because Hollister showed the stuffed critter to Clovis before the flashback.

Hollister goes to the District Attorney to try to get a break for his son.  DA Henshaw won’t violate his oath of office because that would be unethical.  After all, he’s a lawyer for God’s sake!

Er, I mean he won’t let the fact that the victim’s father was a campaign contributor sway him.  After all, he’s a politician for crying out loud!

Uh, I mean in order to assure justice is done, he will stay in the office working nights and weekends.  After all, he’s a civil servant for Pete’s sake!

OK, Tim is screwed.

His father really didn’t help the situation by antagonizing the DA.  Henshaw actually seems like a pretty fair guy.

I take it back.  DA Henshaw is a shark in court.  His strategy is to point out the fox and other animals in Tim’s collection were all shot in the eye to preserve their bodies for the taxidermist.  McCaffery was also shot in the eye, ergo it was intentional.  First of all, if Tim is shooting all those animals right in the eyeball, he should be on a SWAT team!  Maybe he broke his leg skiing during a biathlon.  Second, what would be the benefit of shooting McCaffery in the eye?

Anyhoo, he is sent away for life in prison.  I wish I could tell you that Andy fought the good fight, and the Sisters let him be. I wish I could tell you that – but prison is no fairy-tale world.^[3]  Oh wait, this is Tim’s story.  Yeah, he died in prison shortly thereafter.

Turns out Clovis is actually from the District Attorney’s office and he identifies the skeleton as belonging to Henshaw.  Hollister confesses, but then stabs Clovis in one of the most lackadaisical stabbings I’ve ever seen.  The next tour group sees two Caucasian skeletons.

Not a bad outing.  Certainly better than the previous episode.  It just didn’t grab me for a few reasons.  First, Bert Convy was not much of an actor.  Or maybe I just keep expecting him to say, “The Password is . . .” ^[5]  Second, Ed Platt was great as the Chief in Get Smart, but I just can’t take him in a serious role with an unserious jet-black toupee.  In a comedic role, I never noticed how grating his voice is.  Also, he and McCaffery Jr seemed like caricatures.  Both seemed to be hamming it up, especially Jr.  It also seemed like AHP played it a little cute with the skeletons.  They didn’t outright lie, though, so I guess that one is on me.

Other Stuff:

• [1]  Actually, they are Chekov’s Obsidian Knives as bare*bones points out, but why bring Star Trek into it?
• [2]  We don’t see the business end of the implement, but it is referred to as a pitchfork.  The strange thing is, he swings it like a shovel.
• [3]  Shawshank.
• [4] Upon review, he does not say the skeleton is his son.  But boy do they want you to infer that!
• [5]  I knew him from Tattletales.  I didn’t even know he hosted Password, but that gives me an excuse to include another Odd Couple clip below.  Bonus:  It also serves as a farewell to Betty White.